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you found your way back into my soul, how…

this long lost traveler, long lost love tore

waves were waved and goodbyes relayed

bags packed for a forever that would never stay

watched you leave, cried on your living grave


made my peace, learned what open love gave


lit a torch in my cave during heart’s bloody rain


yet let go of hope for rescue that never came


as time ran forward like a wayward deer


sprinting through forest hell bent on being free


earth spun in sunken eyes, drunk on toxic tears


jaded by pain, not to believe again, I disappear


blending into the mold in the meadow


tread upon by passing bedfellows


wondering where you flew


to see you alight, aglow


upon my torch raised


drop to knees

I blow it out
light floods in
lead me
home

~ Emily C. 10.20.17

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Colors Bled

Colors bled on glass lake
deep reds trapped deep
mirage for eyes beckons
but waves away at touch

can’t capture it, don’t try
they will call you in to die
sinking in the fallen leaves
your ambitious hope denied

color attracts
for love and death

poison or passion
— watch your step

know your petals
know your heart

know when to touch 
and when to not

~ Emily C. 10.12.17

Tears Don’t Fall

Tears don’t fall

In outer space

They stay pooled

Against one’s face

I will fly there

To seek escape

Gather saline

In a jar…

But I dare say:

It won’t be large

Enough for tears

I’ll expect to cry

For my fate, when

I realize just

How far away

I had to soar

To see me…free

A specimen

You kept

Wings clipped

Habitat restricted

In form and function

Pinned to your bulletin board

Studied and displayed

Until one day

I broke the glass

With a scream

Echoing into

My future dream

In a cold vacuum

Unreachable by all

Save for my own heart

And a salty mason jar

~ Emily C.

10.8.17

Ash

the wind arrives with a familiar fury
she wonders whether or not to bury
her head, heavy still with last year’s
seasons — fireplace and smoke,
pores choked in acrid pain that won’t
wipe clean, just smears like tears
on skin that used to rebound,
resilient as a rubber band, now
snaps. awakened by the sound
of herself coming to. the truth.
and no way around it. but through
another season she goes, brave
like an iron poker in the fire
of time. she radiates attraction.
a mesmerizing glow. pretty to look.
but don’t touch. her heat will burn you.
the wind’s fury pulls her smoke up,
curls her exhausted air, like the hookah
the caterpillar tokes.
her ‘help’ rises from her cold ash,
disperses on the wind reminding her
who’s in charge — dear girl, not you.
not you.

 

~ Emily C.

10.6.17

Poisoned Dreams

your chest was once my pillow
your heart my poisoned dreams
the driving rain on the window
my tears echoed in their grief

a stroke of hand feels for flesh
reveals illusion in night’s death
a nothingness in place of you
a vacant cold my hands caressed

your image stirs behind tired lids
your name froths on tip of tongue
drifting to unconsciousness
toxic dreams of hope, my bane

to wake, to sleep, matters not
either realm reminds me
you left your crumbs of memories
dried bits of love left molding

o, slip me wine, a bottle or two
numb this aching heart
how can one escape a ghost
when he’s in every thought

 

~ Emily C.

10.4.17